BUTT CHUGGING: SEMI-SOCIAL DRINKING IN THESE HARD TIMES

Some young people are coming up with some crazy stuff to do during these hard times. Looking at my own life as well as most people I know and observe, I’ve long thought it to be a miracle that anyone in our society survives their twenties. As time passes, this survival seems to become ever more miraculous in view of the destruction of our environment, and the reduction of access to basic needs for the great majority of people.

I was at the gym this evening, tuning in to CNN as I did my cardio workout on the treadmill. That’s all they offer apart from football; so, there really is no choice.

I was actually thankful when they finally took a break from spreading lies about what is going on in Syria and turned to some sad and sordid human interest stories. These tales came in the form of Anderson Cooper’s RidiculList show.

One of the items on Cooper’s show was about butt-chugging.

Apparently, a frat house full of geniuses down at the University of Tennessee were inserting wine up their rectums when one of them ended up in the emergency room because of it. Cooper said it wasn’t the first time something like this has been reported.

It was news to me; and, once I got home, I read up on it a bit.

Sure enough, there have been some instances of this craziness reported as far back as 2007. One article I saw had a photo of a guy laying on the floor with a plastic tube apparently up his glory hole. He looks like he has lost all motor function. I spotted a comment on another site where a reader advised to “do red because white stings.”

I don’t think this practice is as common as, say, quarters was in my day, but it is certainly not unheard of – except by me, before today. Adherents claim that, unlike having a “drink,” in the traditional manner, i.e., through your mouth, this method bypasses the liver and gets you real tanked, real quick. Another benefit is that you won’t have alcohol breath.

If it suits your fancy, you can also soak a tampon in vodka and insert it into your rectum or vagina. Another attractive possibility.

Really re-defines the meaning of the phrase “social drinker,” doesn’t it? I